“You’re out of your mind,” they told her. When she kept insisting that it was so, they said, “It must be his angel.”
Acts 12:15 NIV
I have always found this verse amusing, maybe in part because I identify with it. Peter was in prison and the church was praying for him. An angel appeared and busted him out of jail. But when Peter showed up at the prayer meeting going on for his release, the folks praying for him are slow to believe their prayers had been answered, instead assuming the worst. How many times am I surprised when God answers my prayers? But why should I be? Didn’t he promise that if I asked appropriately he would respond? Unexpected answered prayer should not be. We should instead be expecting an answer to our prayer.
A tragedy came upon my family. I cry night and day about it. God came to me and said Tony is with me. I am looking right at him. He said Jermayne (my son) will be okay. Why can’t I just stand on those words instead of being still so sad? I want to trust God but it still does not take away the pain and heartache that I feel. I try to grow stronger in the word and I’ve joined a Bible class and all of that helps. But I continue to have this internal sadness. I know how Paul must have felt initially when Jesus came to him along the road in Damascus. All that he had worked for and believed in were gone. He had to start all over. I feel like that now. I spent all those years raising six children alone after my divorce. Putting them in different activities always promoting education and trying to provide the best there was. All for what? Some days I just feel so alone and I think if only I had put God in our life more it would be different.
I have few words that can offer you comfort in your grief and loss. I do not really know your situation. But God does. And he cares for you beyond our understanding, and understands exactly what you feel. Pour out your grief to him. Read some of the Psalms where the author is pouring out his anguish and confusion. You will not offend God by telling him how you feel. The pain and loss may never go away completely. But you can find comfort in his arms.
I suspect all of us have some regrets, wishing we could change something from our pasts. I know I do. But we cannot. And it does very little good to dwell on past failures. All you can do is live as best you can now and into the future. Make the most of the time that is given to you.
Amen and thank you for those words of encouragement.
Thank you for the post! I too have often wondered how different things would be if our perspectives were changed when it came to what we prayed for. What if, when I prayed, I actually expected God to answer my prayer? What if my norm was: I pray, and I expect God to answer.
What if, instead of being surprised when my prayers are answered I am surprised when they are not answered. I am not suggesting that I can commission God to answer my prayers the way I want Him to answer them; I am simply saying that I should have more faith when it comes to approaching God in prayer.
Blessings.
Joey
Yeah, it is unfortunate that so much of the time when we pray, we are not really expecting anything to come from it.