And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. You must put away all bitterness, anger, wrath, quarreling, and slanderous talk—indeed all malice. Instead, be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ also forgave you.
Ephesians 4:30-32 NET
As believers, the Holy Spirit serves several important functions in our lives. One of these is as a seal. A seal served as a guarantee and a mark of ownership. Being sealed by the Holy Spirit marks us as belonging to God. And it guarantees our inheritance until the redemption of God’s people (Eph. 1:13-14).
But as believers, sealed by the Spirit, we can grieve or sadden the Holy Spirit. How might we do that? Anytime we fail to follow his leading, we will grieve him. But in this passage, Paul offers us one specific way to grieve the Spirit.
When I harbor bitterness or resentment against another believer, I grieve the Holy Spirit. When my words are unkind or hurtful, I grieve the Spirit. And when I argue or quarrel with another believer, it saddens the Spirit.
Earlier in this chapter, Paul told us to make “every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Eph. 1:3). So when our words, attitudes, or actions cause division within the body of Christ, whether at the local or global level, we are failing to keep the unity of the Spirit, and so grieving him.
So, as believers and members of the body of Christ, choose instead to speak and act in ways that will build up the body and foster unity. Let’s be kind and loving toward each other. When we do, the Spirit will be pleased rather than grieved.
This does not mean that we should compromise our faith in any way. There are many false teachers today, just as there were in Paul’s time. Be on guard against those distorting the truth and leading people astray (Eph. 4:14). Speak the truth. But do so in love (Eph. 4:15).